5 Reasons You Shouldn’t Feel Guilty for Self-Care

Some time ago I did a super scientific poll on TikTok asking nurses to identify their biggest barriers to self-care. Ok, not really scientific, but I did have over 150 responses. There were some common themes in those responses. From them, I pulled the top 10, which I listed in a previous post.

In upcoming posts, I want to take time to speak to each of these barriers.

One that came up over and over again was guilt. I can totally identify with this one, yet it makes me really sad. How is it that people have such high value for other people and spend so much time caring for others think themselves unworthy of that very same care? Even worse, at least one person said that they had actually been told it was selfish for them to take time for themselves.

So, should we feel guilty for taking time for self-care?

The short answer is NO!!

But, I know that’s easier said than done. So, here are 5 reasons you shouldn’t feel guilty for self-care:

1 – You deserve to be cared for.

You put so much of yourself into caring for others. You do it because you value those people. Here’s the thing. You carry the same value. I know that many of you are going to read this and will not FEEL it. I would challenge you to give me any reasons why you are less deserving of the same sort of care you give to your patients, family, and friends.

In fact, I’ll take it one step further. If you think that you don’t deserve the same sort of care that you constantly give to others, then EMAIL me and let’s talk about it.

2 – Caring for yourself actually makes you better at caring for everyone else.

I don’t need to tell you that constantly caring for everyone else is exhausting at times. It takes a lot of energy. Those of us that do this for a living have a huge capacity for giving to others. Still, we get tired. Taking time to care for yourself gives you the fuel you need to continue caring for others. Yes, you can push through and keep going without self-care, but you will get tired and you will not be able to give the same level of care.

3 – If you don’t, you will eventually run out.

As I said above, we nurses have an enormous capacity for giving to others. But, that capacity is not unending. When I think of this I always think of a watering can. Imagine a watering can that you might use to water your plants. That can has the capacity to carry water to the plants and give them what they need.

At some point, you have to refill that can or it can’t do the job it was designed to do. It still has the CAPACITY to carry water, to give those plants what they need, but it no longer has the ABILITY because it is empty.

We are the same way. We constantly pour out of ourselves and into everyone else. We have great CAPACITY, but if we don’t take time to fill ourselves back up, we will eventually run out of the ABILITY to care for everyone else, because we will be empty.

4 – You’re not a water hose

If we are honest, many of trying to pretend that we are more like a water hose. You see, if I go outside my house to the water hose and turn it on there is a near-endless supply of water. We behave as if we are the same. We act as if we can just keep giving and giving and will never run out.

This is simply not true.

You’re awesome. You have an amazing capacity for giving. But, you’re not invincible and your capacity for giving does have a limit.

5 – You’re already tired

If you’re honest, I bet you’d admit that you’re already tired. I don’t know many nurses that aren’t. Many of us were already tired before going into this pandemic and this has quite literally sucked the life out of us.

The statistics reflect this. Nurses are leaving the profession at an alarming rate. While some of this is simply that nurses have given up hope that their employers are going to do anything to try and fix their situations, for many it’s simply that they have run empty. Completely empty.

Are you already tired? Are you ready to start taking better care of yourself? Download your free self-care guide below to get started now.