Nurses, Remember the Good Days

Nursing is hard. Like REALLY hard. I can almost guarantee that you will leave after some shifts and wonder if you made the right decision about becoming a nurse or if you should walk away. For me, the most memorable of those days was when I had 3 people die in a 4 hour period. Two of those people had been talking to me when they arrived. One had walked in through the front door. If that doesn’t make you second guess your career choice, then probably nothing will and you might not be human.

Truth is that this is an extreme example. With almost 20 years in the ED, this extreme circumstance only happened once. But, there were many other difficult days when I wondered if I should have ever become a nurse, or if I should begin to consider other options. If you’re currently a nurse and have not felt this way, brace yourself, it’s coming. If you are not yet a nurse, go into it knowing that there will be days like this. As these days stack up, it’s no wonder that nurse burnout is such an issue.

How do you come back?

After having 3 patients die in 4 hours, it’s really hard to get up the next day and come back to work. Certainly, there was some financial motivation for this, I mean the mortgage company wants to get paid every month and my kids want to eat every single day. But, this sort of motivation can only keep you going for a short time. After all, if it’s just about money, there are other ways to make it. Heck, there are many things that will actually allow you to make more money than being a nurse. The money is important, but it’s not enough.

So, what does keep me going?

For all the really difficult moments and shifts, there are some truly beautiful ones. I’m talking about things more beautiful than even what you might see in a TV medical drama or the chick flicks my wife makes me watch. (Ok, maybe I like them too.) These moments stand out as sources of light in your day and in your career. When things feel dark, it is the light from these moments that keep you going. I have often thought about some of these bright moments when walking through some of the darkest days of my life and career. This is what keeps me going. I think it will also be what keeps you going.

My challenge to you

I wish someone would have told me this many years ago. I really think that this would have helped me so much on some of those dark, difficult days I’ve been talking about. My challenge to you is to do two things. 

First, start a journal

Not like a “dear diary” kind of thing. Not a journal that you write in every day. No, this journal is just for the shining moments in your nursing career. This is for the stories that make your job worth it. In over 20 years as a nurse, I have so many of those stories. Unfortunately, since I didn’t write them down, it’s hard for me to remember them all. There are some really powerful ones that I can remember very well, but I know that there so many others that I simply can’t remember. So, whenever those moments happen that really make your job worth it, write about it. As soon as possible, write that story in your journal. Include as much information as you can, without violating the patient’s privacy. When you get an email from your manager or someone else talking about the gratitude that a patient or visitor expressed to you, write that in your journal.

Keep every card

Nursing is often a thankless job. This is especially true in areas like the ED and OR, among others. In these areas, patients are generally sent somewhere else to get better. By the time they get to where they are feeling better and start to say thank you, they have long since left the ED or OR. Still, there will be cards. There will be notes. There will be emails. There will be things that people give you to show their appreciation for the care you give. KEEP THESE. Get a box now. Start putting these cards and notes in that box. If management posts a card or letter about you in the department, ask about making a copy of it for your own records, then put it in the box.

Open it on your dark days

On those days that make you doubt your qualification to be a nurse, open these things. Open your journal and read some of the stories. Open your box and read some of the cards. Trust me it is these stories that will keep you going. I certainly have enough of them to keep me going, but how many more could I have had if I had been doing these two things for the 20-plus years that I’ve worked in healthcare?

Need help?

This sort of habit is a part of good self-care. Want help knowing where to start, I wrote my book The Restored Nurse to do exactly that, to help you know where to start. Pick up your copy on Amazon today!.