10 Top Reasons Nurses Don’t Do Self-Care

Nearly every nurse would agree that self-care is good. Most would even go so far as to say that it is a necessity. Still, most of us do a terrible job with it.

Most of us are willing to admit that if we don’t do better at caring for ourselves it will, at some point, affect how we care for everyone else. And, yet we don’t do it.

Some time ago on TikTok, I asked nurses what their biggest barriers were to self-care. You can watch that video and read the responses HERE. While there was a wide range of answers, there were some common themes.

So, here are the top 10 reasons nurses don’t do self-care along with some quotes from the comments. Some of these are truly heartbreaking.

1 – Guilt

• “Being time poor and mom guilt”
• “Fear of letting others down”
• “Guilt for spending more time away from my family.”
• “Guilt. Being told I was selfish for doing anything I enjoy for me.”
• “Guilt. Away from family so much already, I feel bad wanting more time away.”

2 – Time

• “Definitely not enough time. Work is mind-consuming even after I leave.”
• “Don’t have time. Work 12 hours for 7 days straight, then having to be mommy and wife, soon exhausted.”
• “Not enough time in the day and just plain exhausted when I do have free time.”

3 – Exhaustion

• “By the time I have a day off, my brain and body don’t work.”
• “Exhausted with people. Want to isolate when I can.”
• “Exhaustion sneaks up on me. Taking care of everyone else.”
• “I am so tired and exhausted from dealing with my job. I get home and can barely eat, shower, and fall in the bed.”

4 – Depression

• “Depression. It took me a while to make peace with the idea, but I finally got help.”
• “Depression. I have my first therapy appointment on Wednesday.”
• “Depression!”

5 – Money

• “Money, hands down. I have money going to just live.”
• “Time, money, family, juggle.”
• “Fatigue, depression, and money.”

6 – Knowledge

• “Not knowing where to start.”
• “For so long I thought sleeping in on my days off, lying in bed all day was self-care.”
• “I don’t think I know what it even means.”

7 – Prioritization

• “I prioritize myself last, dead last”
• “Everyone else takes priority.”
• “Forgetting that I DESERVE to take time for me”
• “I have been programmed, probably by myself, to put others first.”

8 – Motivation

• “Lack of motivation, probably from a combination of depression and exhaustion”
• “Lack of motivation.”
• “Time, money, motivation”

9 – Laziness

• “Laziness”
• “Laziness” (yes, more than one person gave this exact same answer)

10 – Distractions

• “TikTok, LOL”
• “Carrying things on my mind that I wish I would have charted or said differently.”
• “I think the biggest barrier is the constant feeling that I should be doing something productive.”

Do you identify with any of these quotes? I certainly do.

In the coming weeks, I’m going to address each of these items in upcoming blog posts.

In the meantime, if you are ready to take the first step towards taking back control of your life, including taking better care of YOU, my book The Restored Nurse, is a great place to start.