Six Pillars Archives - Restoring Nurses https://restoringnurses.com/category/sixpillars/ Giving nurses the tools they need to build the careers and lives they want Sun, 18 May 2025 21:31:50 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://i0.wp.com/restoringnurses.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Restoring-Nurses-clear-background.png?fit=32%2C32&ssl=1 Six Pillars Archives - Restoring Nurses https://restoringnurses.com/category/sixpillars/ 32 32 143723688 Mindfulness on the Move: Simple Practices for Nurses During a Hectic Shift https://restoringnurses.com/2025/05/19/mindfulness-on-the-move-simple-practices-for-nurses-during-a-hectic-shift/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=mindfulness-on-the-move-simple-practices-for-nurses-during-a-hectic-shift https://restoringnurses.com/2025/05/19/mindfulness-on-the-move-simple-practices-for-nurses-during-a-hectic-shift/#respond Mon, 19 May 2025 12:00:00 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=11976 Nurses face intense stress, but mindfulness offers simple, real-time strategies to process emotions instead of carrying them forward. This post explores practical techniques like deep breathing, sensory grounding, and micro-meditations to help nurses reset, even during chaotic shifts. Learn how mindfulness can protect your mental health and boost resilience.

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It Was the Worst Shift of My Career

This was probably 20 years ago now, maybe more. Yet, I can still remember it. In a four-hour period, I had three patients die—patients assigned to me. I was responsible for them, and they died.

Two of these patients came in, talking to me, and left in a body bag.

I don’t care who you are, that’s heavy. I remember sitting in my car afterward, wondering if I was supposed to be a nurse. Most nurses will go their entire career without experiencing this. Still, many of us went through COVID and carry similar emotional scars.

I wish I had known about mindfulness then. It wouldn’t have kept my patients alive, but it could have helped me deal with the aftermath.

Merriam-Webster defines mindfulness as “the practice of maintaining a nonjudgmental state of heightened or complete awareness of one’s thoughts, emotions, or experiences on a moment-to-moment basis.” (1)

Put simply, mindfulness is being aware of your mental and emotional state at any given moment. It won’t change events, but it can give you better control over how your body processes them.

Why Mindfulness Matters in Nursing

Every nurse has had moments when the emotional weight of the job makes it hard to keep going. We’ve all been yelled at by patients, visitors, physicians, or colleagues. Many of us have experienced a moment of overwhelm where our brain feels like it just… stops.

Mindfulness helps with these moments, not by preventing stress, but by changing how you respond to it. Instead of reacting instinctively, mindfulness helps you regain control and respond in a healthier way.

Beyond immediate benefits, mindfulness also supports long-term mental health. Recognizing how your body reacts to stressors enables you to work through them instead of carrying them forward.

Several years ago, I experienced what I can only describe as a panic attack. At the time, I thought I was having a nervous breakdown. Afterward, I was afraid of things I had never feared before. You can read that full story HERE.

I didn’t know I was using mindfulness, but in the months following, I learned to recognize my body’s reactions early. I could feel the anxiety starting, and say to myself, Okay, I feel anxious. Instead of letting fear spiral, I became curious about why I was feeling that way. This helped me identify triggers, evaluate solutions, and talk myself down before panic fully set in.

Mindfulness can be the difference between carrying trauma forward and processing it in real-time.

Quick Mindfulness Practices for Busy Nurses

Here are simple techniques you can use on the job—even when you don’t have much time:

  • Intentional Deep Breathing: Taking a single deep breath gives your brain space to reset. The Cleveland Clinic notes that deep breathing can reduce heart rate and blood pressure, helping you relax. (2)
  • Grounding with the Five Senses: Become aware of your surroundings through sight, hearing, touch, smell, and taste. This helps anchor you in the present moment and lowers anxiety.
  • Micro-Meditations Between Tasks: Before moving to your next patient, take 10 seconds to refocus. This could be repeating a Bible verse, a positive thought, or a simple affirmation.
  • Gratitude on the Go: Amid chaos, pause to mentally list three things you’re grateful for. This can shift your mindset and prevent stress from overtaking you.
  • Body Awareness Check-Ins: Ask yourself: What does my body feel like right now? Notice tension, pressure, tightness—without judgment. Awareness is the first step toward relief.

Overcoming Common Barriers to Mindfulness in Healthcare

Some nurses may feel skeptical about mindfulness. Here’s how to overcome common objections:

  • “This is stupid.” Nursing breeds cynicism, but mindfulness isn’t fluffy self-help—it’s science-backed stress management.
  • “My mind won’t slow down.” That’s normal! The more you practice mindfulness, the easier it becomes.
  • “I can’t relax.” That’s why mindfulness exists—to help nurses learn how to relax and reset.
  • Low motivation. You won’t always feel like practicing mindfulness. Do it anyway. Consistency is the key.

Closing Thoughts

I know many nurses will skim this and roll their eyes. But if you made it this far, something resonated with you.

If you’re interested in a mindfulness workshop, comment MINDFULNESS to let me know!

Resources:

(1) Merriam-Webster Definition

(2) Cleveland Clinic Guide to Breathing


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Spiritual Health for Nurse: Why it Matters and How to Nurture It https://restoringnurses.com/2025/04/28/spiritual-health-for-nurse-why-it-matters-and-how-to-nurture-it/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=spiritual-health-for-nurse-why-it-matters-and-how-to-nurture-it https://restoringnurses.com/2025/04/28/spiritual-health-for-nurse-why-it-matters-and-how-to-nurture-it/#respond Mon, 28 Apr 2025 12:00:00 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=11965 Spiritual health is vital for nurses, impacting emotional resilience, mental well-being, and self-worth. Unlike religion, it focuses on meaning, purpose, and connection. Simple habits—mindfulness, gratitude, and community—can combat burnout and stress. Prioritize your spirit, because caring for yourself is just as important as caring for others.

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Nurturing Your Spiritual Health: A Guide for Nurses

As nurses, we see and experience things that most people run from. This may seem cliche to say these days, but it’s true. Many people outside of healthcare have no idea what it’s like to sit with a person you don’t even know, so that they don’t die alone, while a worldwide pandemic prevents their loved ones from visiting. Most people never had to witness the anguish on someone’s face as the only access they had to their dying loved one was through an iPad screen or window. This takes a very real toll on nurses and other healthcare workers.

We are very familiar with the mental and even physical effects that the stressors of nursing have on us. However, what’s often ignored is its effect on our spiritual health. There may be a variety of reasons for this. Among them is the connection that many place between spiritual health and religion. We’ll talk more about the difference between the two, but this connection often leads folks to avoid any talk of spiritual health, much to their own detriment and that of other nurses.

Ok, but what IS spiritual health? A quick Google search gives us this definition for spiritual:

“A dimension of wellness focuses on meaning, purpose, and connection, encompassing belief, values, and a sense of connection to something larger than oneself.”

Understanding Spiritual Health in Nursing

Now that we’ve identified what spirituality is, let’s talk about what it’s not. Spirituality is not equal to religion. Yes, if someone has a faith tradition, it will influence their definition of spiritual health, as well as the habits and routines that they use to nurture it. However, spiritually does not automatically mean religion. In my book, The Restored Nurse, I share some of my own spiritual journey as a Christian. Regardless of your religious background, you may find some of yourself in my story.

You can be spiritual, without being religious.

Ok, now that we’ve established that spirituality is not about religion, let’s look at how spiritual health can impact your emotional resilience and mental health. An article from Mass General Brigham hospital shows us how spiritual health can affect mental health in a variety of ways. (1)

  • Purpose and Meaning: Spiritual health practices can help us to gain a sense of purpose and meaning in our lives. In a time when many people struggle with a lack of these things, this can be a powerful tool.
  • Supportive Community: Many spiritual habits include spending time with people who share your beliefs and values. This provides a base for the sort of supportive community that we really all need in the difficult times of our lives.
  • Hope, Self-Esteem, and Self-Worth: Spirituality, even when separate from religion, can help us to see that there is hope beyond our darkest moments. It can help us to believe in ourselves more and improve our sense that we matter.
  • Tools: Spiritual practices can provide he sort of tools that we need to better care for ourselves. 

On a more clinical level, spiritual health habits have been shown to help with addiction, depression, and even lowering suicide risk by as much as 68% in women and 33% in men. (1)

Common Challenges Nursing Face in Maintaining Spiritual Health

It’s among the greatest of ironies that the very people who dedicate their lives to caring for others often ignore the very care that they, themselves, need. Mental healthcare among nurses has almost become a taboo subject, with a large stigma being attached to it. Spiritual healthcare may not have the same level of taboo or stigma, but mostly because it simply gets ignored. I’d say that stigma and lack of awareness are the start of the challenges nurses face when it comes to spiritual health.

Stress and Emotional Exhastion: Let’s be real here, nurses are TIRED. Not just a physical kind of tired that can be fixed by a good nap or a weekend of sleeping in. I’m talking about the kind of tired that you feel DEEP down inside. The kind of tired that has you driving home from work, crying in the car, for no reason, which I did recently.

The job of a nurse has always been hard, but it seems in the past few years, since COVID, it’s gotten worse. I believe that many nurses went into COVID at their limit emotionally, mentally, and spiritually, and came out of it with nothing left. This is why we saw 100,000 nurses leave during COVID and expect nearly a million more to leave by 2027. (2)

The existing emotional exhaustion, the stress that’s a natural part of the job, and the many stressors that are NOT normal are huge factors making spiritual health even harder for nurses.

Compassion Fatigue: I won’t go much into this, cause I covered this in some detail in last week’s blog post. Still, understand that it is a factor that affects spiritual health.

Time constraints and lack of self-care focus: Some time ago, I asked nurses on TikTok to identify their biggest barriers to self-care. Time was one of the top answers. We work long hours, weekends, nights, holidays, etc, 24 hours, 7 days a week, Nurses are working to care for other people. On top of that, many of us have lives outside of work, regardless of what our employers may want. This all leaves us with limited time for self-care, especially spiritual health.

Practical Strategies for Nurturing Spiritual Health

Personal reflection and mindfulness: Recently, on LinkedIn, I shared a post on mindfulness. In its most basic form, mindfulness is about understanding yourself both mentally and physically. If you’re interested in learning more about mindfulness, I’m planning a Mindfulness Workshop.

Meditation: While meditation is a common practice among a wide range of religions, it’s an amazing practice that you can benefit from, even if not religious.

Gratitude: This is another topic I discuss in The Restored Nurse. This can be a gratitude journal that you write down 3-5 things you are grateful for every day, or simply thinking about what you’re grateful for as you drive to work.

Finding meaning in your work: I recently spoke at a pinning ceremony for a nearby nursing school. One of the things I told these soon-to-be nurses was that if the work you do doesn’t mean anything to you, then it will become harder and harder to do it year after year. If you can’t find meaning in the current work you are doing, seek out work that does give you meaning.

Community: We are made for community. This can be as simple as spending time with friends or as big as religious or other gatherings with people who share your beliefs and values. You NEED those relationships. They will feed your spiritual health, but also your mental and relational health.

Prayer, music, time outside, and many other things can feed your spiritual health. If you’re not sure which practice is best for you, just start doing SOMETHING. Take the time to learn what works best for you. The truth is that even as you try some things and find that some don’t work as well as others, your spiritual health will benefit, even from this process of discovery.

Conclusion

If you get nothing else from this post, remember that you are a spiritual being, even if not a religious one. As you work to take care of all the other parts of yourself and your life, don’t ignore this one. If you do, you may make great advancements in your life, only to find that you still feel empty. That emptiness is within your spirit. Be sure to fill it.

REFERENCES

  1. https://www.mcleanhospital.org/essential/spirituality
  2. https://www.ncsbn.org/news/ncsbn-research-projects-significant-nursing-workforce-shortages-and-crisis

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I just want to love being a nurse again https://restoringnurses.com/2024/12/05/i-just-want-to-love-being-a-nurse-again/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=i-just-want-to-love-being-a-nurse-again https://restoringnurses.com/2024/12/05/i-just-want-to-love-being-a-nurse-again/#respond Thu, 05 Dec 2024 18:00:26 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=11839 I was ready to leave nurse, but it turns out what I needed was a change of scenery. That might be what you need too.

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I was ready to quit

I can still remember standing in the woods near the church we were attending at the time. As tears streamed down my face, I looked to the sky and yelled these exact words, “I just want to love being a nurse again.”

I had been a nurse for 19 years and had always loved it. But, I didn’t anymore.

It wasn’t nursing I hated

Looking back, I can see that I still loved nursing, but what I didn’t love was the place I worked or the way I was treated there. Still, I was ready to leave nursing completely. If I had any idea of how to support my family in similar way to how I was able to as a nurse, I probably would have left nursing.

Now that a few years have passed, I’m glad I didn’t leave.

I determined that I would build a life I loved

From this moment, under the trees, I began a journey to build a life I loved.

This started with getting out of the terrible job I was in and finding something that better suited me. Taking time to look back on my career I realized that I had always been teaching. This was true not only in my job but also in many of the things I did outside of work. Not only had I always been teaching, but looking back, I realized that I loved doing it and that I was really good at it.

This started a journey that took me to complete my BSN, and then go on to get my MSN-Ed and spend the years since then working as a nurse educator in hospitals and universities.

It’s not just about work

This story starts with me wanting to leave nursing. I know that many nurses have felt the same way. I found that changing my specialty and where I worked was enough to reignite the passion for nursing that I thought was gone forever.

If you’re considering leaving nursing, I’d encourage you to consider changing where you work, the specialty you work in, or some other change before you leave completely. It may be time to leave, but a change of scenery could change everything for you.

In a recent Podcast episode, I discuss this very topic:

Is it Time for You to Leave Nursing?

If you need someone to talk to, my inbox is always open and I promise, I will not try to sell you anything.

Matt Norman

P.S. The Companion Workbook for my book, The Restored Nurse, is now available on Amazon.

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“Who As Room 19?” https://restoringnurses.com/2024/07/26/who-as-room-19/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=who-as-room-19 https://restoringnurses.com/2024/07/26/who-as-room-19/#respond Fri, 26 Jul 2024 12:05:13 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=11355 Sometimes we may feel like we are the only one's struggling. Truth is, we all experience similar things. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

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“Who has room 19?”

Recently my office was moved from a hallway to a patient unit. Like across the hall from my office now, are patient rooms. Last week I was sitting in my office, doing my thing, when I heard a physician walk by and call out, “Who has room 19?”

I kinda chuckled.

What I wanted to do in that moment was to do what I had done a few times with physicians in the ED. I wanted to walk him over to the whiteboard where the assignments are listed, and “introduce” him to it. In this case, I didn’t really know this physician and didn’t think it would go over very well, but still it was funny.

As I thought about it a little longer, I was struck by how similar the things we face in nursing are, regardless of where we are. You see the ED where I would “introduce” physicians to the whiteboard was in a different hospital, more than an hour from my current hospital. Oh, and more than a decade has passed since I last worked in that ED.

This is important for us to understand because it reminds us that we are not alone. The difficulties that we face are being faced by many other nurses around the country and the world. This doesn’t make the problems go away, but sometimes it helps to know that we are not the only one’s struggling through the same sort of stuff.

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The Stands Were Empty https://restoringnurses.com/2024/07/10/the-stands-were-empty/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=the-stands-were-empty https://restoringnurses.com/2024/07/10/the-stands-were-empty/#respond Wed, 10 Jul 2024 12:00:00 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=11392 Work is busy, but balance is possible. It just looks different than what you think. The right tools and a new perspective is what you need.

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Marching band is LIFE

At least it WAS life when I was in high school. Marching band gave me the motivation and drive I needed to graduate after a pitifully undisciplined start to high school.

Marching band was everything to me. It was the most important thing I had going on. That is until I met the girl who would become my wife, but she was in the marching band too, so win-win.

They were never there

To this day I can close my eyes and see the stands of the football stadium at my high school.

I can see the image of me looking side to side as I stand in attention waiting to start our show, or having just finished it and basking in the applause.

I can also remember that empty feeling when I discovered that my parents weren’t there… again.

I can’t honestly say that my parents ever saw me march. It was the most important thing in my life and they were never there.

They had to work

I get it. We didn’t have much money and they had bills to pay. So, they had to work.

Still, you’d think they could have been there occasionally. You’d think that I’d have some memories of them being there, but I don’t.

Many of the nurses I’ve worked with are in the same boat. They are trading the opportunity to be with the people who love them for a job that never will.

I don’t say this to make anyone feel guilty but rather to make us all think.

It’s hard, but it doesn’t have to be this way.

It’s possible to have an amazing life and career, while still being there for your family.

Our son was in the marching band in high school, the same marching band my wife and I met in. Our daughter is currently in that same marching band.

We are there for everything. For the past 7 years or so, the band’s trailer has seen almost no miles that didn’t happen attached to my pickup truck.

This is possible when you start building balance in your life.

If you’re ready to start building this kind of balance in your own life, comment BALANCE to be added to the waiting list for my upcoming workshop, Building a Balanced Life.

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Are You Working Too Much? https://restoringnurses.com/2024/07/08/are-you-working-too-much/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=are-you-working-too-much https://restoringnurses.com/2024/07/08/are-you-working-too-much/#respond Mon, 08 Jul 2024 14:01:56 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=11383 If we are not careful we can drift into working more than we want.

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I’m never going to be like that.

As a child, my parents worked very hard. Unfortunately, this meant they missed many events that were very important to me. I’m not mad at them, but the reality is that it affected me. Early in my career, I swore that I’d never be like that.

Yet somehow, it happened.

It was a slow fade.

Looking back, there was never a moment when I chose to prioritize my work over my family, it just kinda happened. Little by little, my priorities drifted from my family to my work.

For me, I recognized this slow fade and corrected it while my kids were still at home. This meant that I got to be at all my kids’ stuff while they were in middle school and high school and still very present for my son as he had gotten married and will be welcoming his first child, and my first grandchild, in a couple of months.

You’ve got to be intentional.

I hear you. Some of you work the way you do because you have no choice. Your life requires that you work as much and when you do. In the short term, I would encourage you to be intentional about the time you have to spend with your children, spouse, or partner.

In the long term, I would encourage you to start building a life that allows you to focus more on family and less on work.

Your work should fit your life and not the other way around.

I know that this may mean making some difficult choices. I drive a 13-year-old Chevy Silverado that is paid for. Sure, I’d love to have something newer, but I’m not willing to give up the time with our teenage daughter or with my wife in order to drive something newer.

So, are you working too much?

I can’t answer that question other, but here are some questions that might help you in answering that questions:

  1. Does your work cause you to regularly miss family events?
  2. Have you built a life that requires you to work more than you want to?
  3. Do you have a specific goal for the money you make from working extra?

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Leave a comment, or shoot me an email at matt@restoringnurses.com and tell me, Are you working too much?

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I’m Writing a Book! https://restoringnurses.com/2023/10/10/im-writing-a-book/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=im-writing-a-book https://restoringnurses.com/2023/10/10/im-writing-a-book/#respond Tue, 10 Oct 2023 17:02:37 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=10963 Self-care is so much more than drinks with friends, coffee on the porch, or vacations in tropical locations. It's also more than just physical or mental health.

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If you’ve been following me here, or on social media, then you know that I’m all about encouraging nurses. More specifically, I work to encourage nurses to take better care of themselves and to help them figure out how to do it.

Well, now I’m taking that to the next level.

The Restored Nurse

The title of the book is The Restored Nurse. What’s up with that title?

Well, I’ll put it this way. I love cars. I love to watch shows where people find these old cars that are worn out and broken down. I love to watch as these experts that cars that most of us would just send to the junkyard and rebuild them, often making them even better than when they were new.

If we are honest, many nurses can related to that rusted out, broken down old care, even after just a few years.

I believe that we, as nurses, can be restored just like that old car. Even as the restored car is often better than it was when new, I think we can be restored to better than when we were new nurses. No, I’m not promising to make you feel like you did when you were 25. But, what I am promising is that you can build a life that is better than the life you had at the beginning of you career.

What is a Restored Life?

As I set out on a journey to learn what it meant to take better care of myself, I spent sometime exploring exactly what that meant. The result was what I call the 6 Pillars of a Restored Life:

  • Work Health
  • Physical Health
  • Mental Health
  • Spiritual Health
  • Relational Health
  • Financial Health

What about the book?

Well, in the book, I introduce you to each of the 6 pillars. However, before that, we take some time to explore who you are. When I say that, I don’t simply mean your name. I’m also not talking about you being a nurse. I’m talking about who you are beyond nursing. You see, I believe this is the first step we all have to take in order to start building a restored life.

Stay tuned as I begin to give you a sneak peek into the contents of the book in upcoming posts. 

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Nurses can improve their mental health. Interview with Paige Matthison https://restoringnurses.com/2023/02/17/how-nurses-can-care-for-their-mental-health-interview-with-paige-matthison/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=how-nurses-can-care-for-their-mental-health-interview-with-paige-matthison https://restoringnurses.com/2023/02/17/how-nurses-can-care-for-their-mental-health-interview-with-paige-matthison/#respond Fri, 17 Feb 2023 13:00:00 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=10781 Talking about our struggles is not weak. In fact is VITAL!

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In today’s episode, I talk with Paige Matthison. Paige is an RN turned mental health counselor. We talk about that transition and her passion for helping healthcare workers with their mental health. 

We also talk about ways that nurses can protect, maintain, and improve their mental health.

Resources from this episode:

Be sure to check out my online RESTORE groups. This is a safe place for you to be with other healthcare workers and talk about the things you struggle with.

SIGN UP TODAY

Not sure where to start with building your healthy, happy life? Download my Healthy, Happy Life Assessment for Nurses today.

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Our Accidental Christmas Tradition https://restoringnurses.com/2022/12/05/our-accidental-christmas-tradition/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=our-accidental-christmas-tradition https://restoringnurses.com/2022/12/05/our-accidental-christmas-tradition/#comments Mon, 05 Dec 2022 13:00:00 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=10039 It's funny how some of the best traditions happen by accident. This is one of those.

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We didn’t set out to start a tradition

Truth is I can’t even remember how it all got started. All I know is that we invited our families over to our house for Christmas breakfast.

Then we opened it up to some family friends who didn’t have any local family.

Now it’s an open invitation to pretty much anyone who wants to come and we LOVE it.

We love having a big crowd of people in our home. We love the opportunity to give people a sense of family that might not otherwise have that on Christmas morning. It has truly become something that we look forward to every year.

Why is it so special?

Why is this event so special? I mean it’s such a simple thing, yet it has come to have so much meaning for my family. In fact, I’ve learned that the others who come look forward to it at least as much as we do.

So, why is it so special? I think it’s special because relationships matter.

Relationships matter and this is an opportunity to be with people who matter to us.

Why do relationships matter?

Relationships are one of the 6 Pillars of a healthy, happy life. Just like the other 5 pillars, if we fail in this one it becomes so much harder to build the healthy, happy life so many of us are trying to build.

I hope that this holiday season you’re able to build up the relationships you have with the people that matter. I know that this can be a very difficult time for many of us.

If you’re ready to start building better relationships on your journey towards building a healthy, happy life, download my Healthy, Happy Life Assessment for Nurses today to get started.

What are your favorite Christmas traditions? Leave a comment below and let me know.

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10 Real Benefits of Gratitude https://restoringnurses.com/2022/11/21/10-real-benefits-of-gratitude/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=10-real-benefits-of-gratitude https://restoringnurses.com/2022/11/21/10-real-benefits-of-gratitude/#respond Mon, 21 Nov 2022 13:00:00 +0000 https://restoringnurses.com/?p=9979 Gratitude may seem like fluff, but there are real benefits to many aspects of your healthy, happy life.

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Gratitude can be really hard. I mean when things are going well, it’s easy to be thankful. When times are hard, it becomes much more difficult. Right now things are really hard in nursing. Maybe harder than they ever have been. This makes expressing gratitude much harder, but also much more important.

Gratitude doesn’t mean pretending that bad or difficult things do not exist. This does not mean ignoring our struggles. Rather, it means being intentional about focusing our minds on the things that are going well in our lives. So, here are 10 Reasons Gratitude Matters.

1. It Changes Your Brain

A 2016 article in INC. magazine pointed to several different studies that showed that gratitude can actually change our brains. In this article, Harvard researcher Shawn Achor said taking time to write down 3 things you are grateful for daily for 21 days can increase your optimism with the effect lasting up to six months. Other studies mentioned in this article show that gratitude can increase your willpower (who couldn’t use more of that), help you stay calm, and even boost employee morale (another thing grossly lacking in nursing today.

2. Help you be more grateful

In that same article, a study found that people taken through a gratitude experiment felt more gratefulness even after the study had ended. This isn’t to say that they came out of the study with rose-colored glasses, unable to see the things that were wrong in the world. They didn’t wake up in the world of Free Guy, where nobody had a good day cause they all had GREAT days. Rather it showed that when they were looking for things to be grateful for, they became better at finding them.

Have you ever bought a new car, or were even shopping for a specific type of car, and suddenly you see them everywhere? It’s as if they barely even existed until you got one and now EVERYONE has one. The reality is that there are likely no more of them around you than there were before. Rather, what has happened is that your recent purchase or interest in that car has placed that car in the Reticular Activating System (RAS). The RAS is part of the brain that helps to filter the input that is important from what is not. We are constantly surrounded by so much information that our brains would shut down (or something) if they tried to process it all. So, the RAS takes those things that we are actively thinking about and helps us to filter all the inputs in order to find more of those things. Who knows, maybe this is one of those changes within our brain that we talked about in #1. In other words, the more you LOOK for things to be grateful for, the more you will SEE things to be grateful for.

3. It can improve your relationships

A study performed at Harvard Medical School found that couples that practiced a habit of expressing gratitude for their partner felt more positive about them. It also showed that they were more comfortable talking about concerns about their relationship with their partner.

Again, this is not a case of looking at your relationships through rose-colored glasses. Rather, it’s another example of what we talked about in #2. The more we look for and express the things we are grateful for in our partner, the easier it becomes to see them. I think it is simply human nature to focus on the negatives. This seems especially true in relationships. Expressing gratitude for our partners forces us to stop looking at the negatives for a short time and see the positives. Want to take it to another level, try expressing gratitude FOR your partner, TO your partner.

This part is not just between partners, however. This will work on literally all the relationships in your life. Want to improve your relationships with your children, express gratitude for and to them. Want to see more good in your boss, look for things to be grateful for (Yes, I know this one can be really hard sometimes). Want to have a better working relationship with your coworkers, express gratitude for and to them.

4. It can improve your heart health

Another Harvard Medical School study, from 2019, showed that gratitude can even improve your heart health. In this study, they looked at people with heart failure. Those that kept a daily habit of listing three to four things they were grateful for had decreased levels of inflammatory hormones and maintained a lower heart rate during exercise after as little as two months. Another study published in 2017 seems to confirm these results, showing improvements in biomarkers that have been linked to morbidity in heart failure patients. Gratitude is literally good for your heart.

5. It can make you happier

This one links back to the reticular activating system. As mentioned above, the more you look for things to be grateful for, the easier you will be able to find them. Heck, do this long enough and you will find things to be grateful for when you aren’t even trying. According to a 2019 article in Positive Psychology, there is a direct link between gratitude and happiness.

Think about it. We’ve all worked with that person who could see the negative in every situation and was usually all too ready to share it with anyone who would listen and even those that were not listening. Those people ALWAYS seem to be so unhappy. Their RAS is working to show them all the negative things around them and it is making them miserable, maybe without even realizing it. The opposite can happen if you work at it. You can learn to see the good things around you and, as a result, train your RAS to focus on those things. This can’t help but make you happier, in the same way, the person constantly focusing on the negative will make you miserable.

6. It can improve self-esteem

A 2011 study on the positive effects of gratitude showed that people who had a regular habit of gratitude reported greater life satisfaction and self-esteem. A habit of gratitude can come in the form of a gratitude journal. This journal can be anything from something you write daily, sharing your thoughts on things you are grateful for in full paragraph form to as simple as taking time each day to list 3-5 things you are grateful for.

One thing I will say about this one is this; while simply taking the time to think about what you are grateful for can be powerful, writing it down takes it to a whole different level. Something powerful happens within our brains when we take the time to write stuff down. It forces our brain to concentrate on it. It helps us to remember it. It also provides us with a record that we can go back to. On the days when it might be really hard to think of things, you are grateful for, going back to the things you have written down on previous days can serve as a powerful reminder.

7. It can decrease materialism and improve wellbeing

At the onset, it might not seem obvious how materialism can be linked to a lower sense of well-being. However, if you give it a little thought, you know that you’ve known people that never seem satisfied with what they had. They were always buying new stuff in a never-ending question for happiness. They never seemed to realize that the things they thought were making them happy, or the next thing they thought would really never do.

A study in 2014 formalized this link. It found that materialism was negatively associated with well-being. It also found that people who practiced gratitude had the opposite effect, experiencing a greater sense of well-being. Who couldn’t use more well-being in their life?

8. It can help with depression

Now, before you roll your eyes, I’m not saying that this can CURE depression. Depression is often far too complicated for a single tool or method to cure it. However, several studies did show that it HELPED with depression. If you struggle with depression, you need to seek professional help. However, I would encourage you to also consider starting a gratitude habit.

9. It can reduce blood pressure

A study from 1977 showed improvements in blood pressure in study participants who “count their blessings” at least once per week. Ok, I know that is an old study and, therefore would not be considered significant if writing a research paper. But, this is not a research paper. As a person who had high blood pressure. I think that this is something I’m going to add to my routine. I will also continue to take my meds, exercise regularly, and work to lose weight, but if this can help too then it’s work trying.

10. It can help make people smile

Ok, this one is not so much about you. Hey, all the benefits don’t have to be for you. I spent most of my career in the emergency room. Sadly, this means that most of the people we care for go somewhere else to get better. This results in us often getting very few thank you’s from patients or families. I know we don’t do it for that reason, but man it’s powerful when it comes. A simple thank you to the server at the restaurant can change her entire day. Saying thanks to your partner, even for the smallest thing can make them smile. Just go out and show gratitude to the people around you. See how many of them will smile as a result.

Be grateful

This week is the Thanksgiving holiday here in the US. For many, this has a religious connotation. However, the benefits listed here are for everyone. Take some time to be grateful today… and every day.

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